25 signs you're Canadian
My fave: 2. You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped
my poutine on the chesterfield."
Let's see...
1. You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK".
Not offended, but a little confused, seeing as I've never seen "homogenized" abbreviated like that.
2. You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield."
Understand perfectly.
3. You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
wth is candy bar?
4. You drink Pop, not Soda.
wth is soda?
5. You know that a Mickey and 24's mean, "party at the camp, eh!!!"
???
6. You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for
your holidays, with good cigars .
Sounds accurate.
7. You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
Agree here, too.
8. You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
wth is freeway?
9. You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
*checks* Yep.
10. You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical
group
Celtic musical group...?
11. You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
I generally postpone my plans if I know this is upcoming.
12. You brag to Americans that; Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion & Mike Myers are Canadians. ... also , Alex Trebec, David Foley, Matthew Perry etc.etc.
I don't brag (as I'm not proud of any of them), but unfortunately I knew them all.
13. You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!
Erm, who?
14. You know what a toque is.
Check.
15. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
Don't, but know people who do.
16. You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always
pronounced "Zed".
Use "zed" and "zee" interchangeably.
17. Your local newspaper covers the national news on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
Another check.
18. You know that the four seasons mean: almost winter, winter, still
winter, and road work.
Except when "road work" becomes 36 degrees C most years.
19. You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day.
Because of the difference between Fahrenheit and Celsius (the latter of which isn't used only by Canadians), yes.
20. You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
Damn right...the Silver Bullet.
21. You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan".
Yes, and I'd assume most Americans would know how to pronounce and spell "Arkansas".
22. You perk up when you hear the theme song from 'Hockey Night in Canada'.
Something like that.
23. You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
Was.
24. "Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite
than, "Huh?"
Part of vocab: yes. Used more than "huh": no.
25. You actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all of your
Canadian friends! Then you send them to your American friends just to
confuse them!
Sort of.
I guess I am, in fact, Canadian. =(
I am Canadian too. I'm in B.C.
On the topic of poking fun at your country, quite some time ago I wrote the most stereotypical things about Canada sung to the last verse of Oh Canada. It's sort of an "other countries" knowledge of Canada. (I hope that the people here will have a sense of humour and not kill me for this)
*Sung to the last verse of Oh Canada*
"Maaaple Syruuup,
C.N Toweer,
Wayne Gretsky, beavers, loonies, Siiiiilent UUUUUs,
it's veeeery cold, and we live iiiiin iiiigloooos!"
You could also substitute "Silent "UUUUs" for "Caribou"
Short story by David Sedaris, who talks about a Dutch holiday (after a short, but also funny intro). You might think he made up the details about this Dutch holiday, but it's actually 100% accurate. If you grew up with the story, it doesn't sound so strange. From his point of view though, the details can't get much weirder. He tells his story really well. Enjoy!
http://www.spikedhumor.com/articles/137619/Six_to_Eight_Black_Men.html
Short story by David Sedaris, who talks about a Dutch holiday (after a short, but also funny intro). You might think he made up the details about this Dutch holiday, but it's actually 100% accurate. If you grew up with the story, it doesn't sound so strange. From his point of view though, the details can't get much weirder. He tells his story really well. Enjoy!
http://www.spikedhumor.com/articles/137619/Six_to_Eight_Black_Men.html
I'm a big fan of Sedaris and that is one of my favorites. He read it for his Live at Carnegie Hall recording which is where I first heard it, and it was pretty great.
