OK, here's a proposal:
Pitchers:- Bisqwit: all-round solid throwing statistics; a good starting pitcher.
- DeHackEd: supreme technical accuracy at the expense of a slightly slower fastball; knows everything about pitching and is excellent at hitting the razor's edge of the strike zone.
- nitsuja: throws mostly straight pitches, but has a 197 mile per hour fastball.
- Bag of Magic Food: messes with batters' minds by throwing trick pitches; is able to throw the baseball in such ways that normal people just can't throw a baseball.
Hitters:- Genisto: a legendary old-timer. To be placed next to Phil in the batting order.
- Phil: tends to hit high pop-ups. Very liberal base leader and steals bases at every available opportunity. Always brags about how he's going to steal home. Intentionally throws his bat at JXQ after making a hit.
- JXQ: intentionally throws his bat at Phil after making a hit. Otherwise a solid performer.
- AngerFist: brandishes his bat menacingly while at the plate. A strong hitter.
- Upthorn: an all-around solid hitter.
- adelikat: an all-around solid hitter.
- Truncated: an all-around solid hitter.
- FractalFusion: an all-around solid hitter.
Pinch Hitters:- moozooh: a good enough hitter in his own right but regularly increases the statistics of other team members as well.
- CtrlAltDestroy: a solid power hitter, actually better than some of the regular hitters at times.
- NesVideoAgent: invoked by commands in the IRC channel; calculates optimal batting swing based on wind speed and direction, velocity and rotation of the ball during the pitch, turf and terrian condition, and exhaustive statistical and psychological data of the other team; always hits the ball to the exact spot that takes the outfielders the longest amount of time to get to, allowing the other players to run the bases and score; during times of heavy server load NesVideoAgent may use Bisqwit's body to make the actual swing; has -124 RBIs due to integer overflow in someone's poorly designed statistics tracking software.
- Deep Loner: An oddball; has been told that he thinks like a baseball player, but has never really done anything useful with a bat and glove before; you may actually want to find another pinch hitter, to tell you the truth. ; P
I think this represents a good cross-section of the site. There are, of course a lot of other great contributors that deserve to be on the list but can't be because of the 4-8-4 limitation.
Oh, and please don't be offended by anything written here. I tried to keep it all positive and it's all in good fun.