Submission #1802: Cardboard's Genesis Robocop vs. the Terminator in 14:32.27

Based on the comic books I guess, Robocop sets out on a rampage to kill mostly everything that moves (and sometimes never have a chance to move) and rescue hostages that go \o/ or \o when rescued. Rescuing hostages is done by touching them in a non sexual way.

The game: This game is mostly amazing. It is bloody, and Robocop climbs fast, jumps high, and beats Terminators with his not-so-bare hands. It only has one flaw. WHY THE HELL IS HE WALKING SO SLOWLY?? I have a theory about that however. Too keep the enemies' shots somewhat slow, Robocop's walking speed was decreased so that the shots would not fly at insane speed to outrun him. I guess. Now, if you can stand the first 4 slow ass levels, then you have an interesting run ahead.

Robocop vs The Terminator is one hard game. Possibly because like 5 hits kill you. Or because the game does not believe in invulnerability time. Yes that is true. Neither you, nor the enemies have ANY KIND OF INVULNERABILITY TIME. Hence, launching 10 grenades that all hit the enemy on the same frame causes SEVERE damage to the target. It may also be hard because the game is just insane in the later levels, with everything trying to kill you. Of course there is a not so pretty glitch here. If you hit an enemy on the same frame as you shoot the next round, no damage is dealt. Sounds like fun? Well it isn't.

Also about the difficulty, the only thing that the hardest difficulty setting does as far as I know is that it alters the amount of lives you have and removes helping arrows which point you in the right direction. Other than that, I doubt that it makes any difference but to avoid needless whine, I changed difficulty.

Weapons: I'll only list the weapons used here. When dying, Robocop loses his active weapon, and it gets replaced with the Handgun. Of course, you can always change weapon while Robocop is falling, and you won't lose your primary weapon. Each weapon gives a different amount of Weapon Bonus at the end of each level, hence keeping the Handgun is a good idea due to its low bonus.

- Handgun: Robocop's standard sidearm. It is actually pretty dangerous, and with 30Hz autofire, it fires 30 bullets per second, and in a game that does not believe in invulnerability timers, 30 bullets per second can cause some serious pain.

- Remote Controlled Grenades: No I did not make that up. The remote controlled grenades are just that. Grenades, that are remote controlled. They simply go in the direction you press, and they all follow the same command (Like a group of school kids), except for sometimes when the game run out of memory and a grenade totally ignores command (Like a group of school kids). Sending a cluster of 10 grenades at a boss mostly makes a short story even shorter.

- Rockets: Sends fast, semi-unpredictable rockets at the direction Robocop is facing. Faster than the grenade launcher, hence a better choice against ED-209 in the Office Complex, due to him having a shitload of HP.

- Lasergun: It's red. That's why I use it.

- Plasma Rifle: The ultimate weapon. Completely removes Terminators from the surface of the earth. Game over dudes.

- Homing Missiles: More like Homing Firecrackers. These suckers barely causes any damage to anything, but it is still useful against the final boss to be able to hurt him between the jumps.

Glitches and stuff:

- Ladder Grab: If you shoot with the Handgun during a jump a few frames before grabbing a ladder, Robocop can grab the ladder up to 5 frames faster, if everything goes well. Therefore, it might look like I miss a few shots, but they have a meaning. This only works when grabbing ladders from the left.

- Rail Jumping: As you will notice, Robocop climbs faster than he walks. No kidding. And when climbing on a rail, Robocop's speed increases, and if he just falls off the rail when the rail ends, he will lose all speed and go back to normal walking speed, but if you jump off the rail, Robocop will keep the speed until he lands. Related to a Rail Jump is...

- Death Slide: If Robocop dies during a Rail Jump, he will keep his high speed until he gets back up on his feet after the death, which allows him to move on the ground for a good while with high speed. This however, is not useful in too many places, but looks cool where it works.

Aaaaand the run:

- Level 1: Introduction! Robocop does some high tech sliding on his foot in the beginning of this level before regaining his sanity and walks for the rest of the level. At the end, he crushes a window and finds a Grenade Launcher, which leads to the question, what is wrong with having flower pots by your windows? The boss is a huge piece of meat who dies pretty much instantly and then explodes.

- Level 2: The streets of Detroit are full of scum. This level contains a lot of house climbing, and I tend to use the Handgun instead of Grenade Launcher for the majority of the level due to it being more user friendly. The boss is an Arnold-look-a-like Terminator who dies a lot.

- Level 3: Construction Site. This is probably the most boring stage in the game. Shooting security cameras restores all your HP. Vandalism at its best! The boss is a strange pile of blue metal with flashlights. Much like the others, he doesn't do that much before dying.

- Level 4: Toxic Dump. This level is similar to the Construction Yard but with more rails and an absolutely hilarious boss. Or so we think. No one has ever seen his upper portion. A Death Slide would have been totally useless here since it would have restored all of my HP, making the HP-countdown take longer time.

- Level 5: Office Complex. Robocop was on his way to rescuing some rebel leaders, but then he remembered that ED-209 stole his Swingline stapler, so Robocop decided to take a trip to the office complex. Now Robocop could set the building on fire, but instead decides to blow stuff up in retaliation to getting his stapler stolen. ED-209 himself gets a taste of the 30Hz Handgun, followed by a hailstorm of rockets. When Robocop later found out that ED-209 had taunted him by saying "PC Load Letter", Robocop got a warm fuzzy feeling.

- Level 6: Underground Hell. The first really unfair level, but luckily it has a lot of invulnerability items, and a laser gun. The boss here is an extra large Terminator, and after it, Robocop hits his head into a rock and dies.

- Level 7: The designer of this level was probably a sadist with a bad hangover. I shall use an IRC-conversation to describe this level.

<Cardboard> BUT WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT WAS THE FUCKING ASS WHO DESIGNED THIS FUCKING LEVEL THINKING ABOUT?????

<Cardboard> Seriously I can not make it out alive TOOL ASSISTED

<JXQ> hahaha holy shit

<Cardboard> Just wow

<Cardboard> So I kill enemies to not get shot... which frees memory... SO MORE ENEMIES CAN SPAWN}}

End of story. Boss is a Terminator with a gatling gun, which does not help him that much. In the end, I get killed by a vice grip running on a pipe which shoots pellets at me to save time. It's hard to be a hero.

- Level 8: Here Comes A New Challenger! The red Terminators are hard mrf:ers, not even the plasma rifle kills them in one hit, luckily the level is short, and in the end, a blue... thing attacks Robocop. The early shots before he spawned was to make Robocop brake. This level contains a completely useless after boss-death since falling into lava instant kills me without draining any HP, but Robocop wanted to get his feet warm.

- Level 9: Another bullshit level with bullets everywhere, and just when you thought that this game could not get any stranger, Robocop is assaulted by a robot spider shitting land mines. I dare however say that this is about as messed up as the game is going to get. At least up until the final boss. The boss in this level, however, is another Gatling Gunner. With this new weapon, the Gating Gunner falls fast.

- Level 10: The End. This level is hard, mostly because the level has a lot of fliers attacking Robocop by going in the opposite direction of each other all the time. I die before the long rail because I had to restore all of my HP for the long rail climb, which ends in another amazing Death Slide. The boss here is a... huge head. Yay for making sense! Dual weapons disposes of him somewhat quickly and the world is once again saved by a hero forgotten by many in today's "Ooooh heroes must look good so teenage girls shall drool over them ;_;"-world.

Good bye!

Here comes a few screenshots I like more than others: http://img509.imageshack.us/img509/439/robocopsvj9.png

The reason why they are like that is because I constantly fail at taking screenshots in Gens so I ended up using Print Screen.

The first 5 are all "Killed in the line of duty", with the fifth one also being proof that touching a hostage in a sexual way does not help him. The sixth one is just proof that Robocop never rests, not even after finishing a mission. The seventh one is a pure execution of the Dressed Terminator, which did not help that much, and the three last are pure action-shots, with the one at frame 34465 being my favorite.

adelikat: Accepting for publication.